Here’s to being extremely vulnerable with this blog.


I’m one of those girls. Just like every other 20 some year old girl, you know the one who has been heart broken. Whose heart has been damaged. I’ve been through it, experienced more heart break than I would have ever thought I would have to. Many optimistic people say “it will get better…. the one who deserves you will find you” “it will all be worth it”  All the cliche shit. It gets old trust me I know, I have heard more than enough of it. But then the other side, the pessimists come in and tell you
“there is alot more heartache coming your way, you’re only 25.” “You’re still young, there are so many men to meet and ones who will hurt you”

Personally screw that. Both of those cases sound terrible. I don’t see happiness in either of those options. Like I don’t want to experience anymore pain. Whether that is heart break, emotional, or mental confusion. I just don’t want to go through it again. Which is why I think I am being so picky lately. Picky with the people in my life, with the people who get my time. Picky with who I choose to spend time with or choose to hold a conversation with. I have put so much effort into relationships and people that never gave HALF of that effort back to me. Do you know how hard it is, at the end of the day to fill yourself back up after you have just poured it all out for someone else? Just to get none of that back, it is exhausting. Constantly pouring out, and then attempting to refill it all by yourself. It is draining; mentally, emotionally, and physically. And it is not a healthy way to live.

Relationships really have to be two, separate people. “Two souls joined as one.” Like each person has to be their own person. Someone else should not be coming into your life to complete you. You should want someone to better YOU, join you in your journey, not be your journey.

Honestly after all the hurt, I would say I am so focused on me, just me. Focused on my own journey and where I am going.  And once you find YOU. Once you re-focus and set your mind on you and only you, it is so freeing. I know some of y’all know what I mean cause you have probably been there. Put your focus on someone else, worried where they were going and what was next for them. Or what was next for you as a couple. Always being selfless and thinking of them before yourself.

The best thing I did for myself is stop being so focused on someone else. Someone becoming my husband, or the father of the children I want. I stopped praying that my husband would walk in and we could get this marriage life started. I stopped dreaming of having everything I want, RIGHT NOW. And just started to enjoy my own life. Life with myself. Now I’m stopping to smell the roses, taking deep breaths, realizing I have time. And amazingly I am learning more of my ins and out. Learning what I bring to the table as a woman, a wife, a mother.

“You see your best potential when you focus on yourself and no one else.”

The sooner I focus on myself, the sooner I start to create the best me and become the best woman and wife I need to be. Then and only then will God bring me a man worth my time. A man who wants the same things I want. Until then, it is all about me and God. I know the whole “independent woman” thing has kind of been played out. It’s always been more of a cliche idea that every woman should strive to be. But if were being honest, It really is the truth. You see your best potential when you focus on yourself and no one else. When it’s just you, and you mess up, that blame is on you. You create the disappointment and then you grow from it. You learn to set a higher standard for yourself. No one else is responsible for your own growth , and that alone is an amazing feeling.

I am no where near the woman I need to be or want to be. BUT that is the beauty of it. You determine your own growth and how far you still need to go. No one else is determining your worth, what you should be, or where you should be. It really is a crazy journey and seriously I have never loved learning more about myself. Who I am, and who I am becoming, I am learning to love ME. I have become a stronger woman already with this mentality. I know I still have weak points, and people but I am still working and growing.

Now is the time to Love Yourself, when your 18, 22, 26, shoot even 40. You deserve to learn what loving yourself feels like. If you know how to love yourself correctly. You will hold a much higher standard to others who are in your life or those who come into your life. People cannot love you less than you deserve if you hold them to the same standard you hold yourself. So here is to: self love, growth, strength, wisdom, and becoming the best version of myself, for myself!

I truly hope this finds its way to someone needing that extra push. You got this girl. The best you is inside of you right now, you just have to let her fly.


Thanks for reading, stay tuned for more from The Chaos.

Vlogging round one.

This was so hard for me to dive into. This video is extremely outside my comfort zone. It is my first Vlog ever, and personally I am not happy with it. But I had to start some where. SO here it is. If you have 20 minutes and feel like some entertainment.

Watch and enjoy. Share for others to laugh *face palm* and send me some comments for suggestion, content or topics to discuss, anything and everything to help me out! 🙂

Thanks y’all for the support. More to come soon.

Stay tuned for more from The Chaos. XOXO.


Click the link to watch my first vlog, and maybe my last. LOL **as soon as I figure out how to post the video directly that will be helpful* I am trying y’all this is hard!

Vlogging round one.

Sorry for the…. Delay

Hello Lovely’s

I know I’ve been neglecting you all and my joy of writing for that matter. But toooo much has been going on I couldn’t find five minutes to sit down and write.

Your girl went ahead and bossed up. Found a job working in an Ortho Clinic that I love. Seriously have been enjoying every minute of it, including dressing myself in business cas like everyday. And I had to go ahead and get my certification in Mammography. You know so I can go ahead and save the tatas! So I’ve been MIA adapting to all the new environment and studying my ass off for my boards.


Meanwhile…… all my other life has not slowed down what so ever. So just wanted to give y’all a little update on my life and a new story will be coming your way. Because apparently the devil and men never rest a day in their life. They are always out trying to ruin somebody’s life.

With that being said, Stay tuned. Promise it will be out for y’all to read soon. 🙂

For now, enjoy The Chaos of your own lives. XOXO.

Chap-stick you’ll never lose!

Okay now that you’re here let’s clear some things up.

This blog is going to give you new tricks to avoid losing your chap-stick. Because let’s be honest, when you have that ONE favorite chap-stick you lose it within five times of using it and that’s like uber depressing. However *disclaimer* I am not giving you tips that will stop you from losing your chap-stick EVER again cause that is completely up to you, BUT I have lots of helpful ideas and tips that will trick your brain into remembering where your chap-stick is.

Let’s start.

1. The Big Secret

That ONE favorite chap-stick, You know the one that you love how it makes your lips feel, the perfect scent, maybe even a nice flavor to it, yeah that one! Well why do you only buy one?  If you buy it and then discover that this one indeed is the bomb.com well you obviously need more! So Step two is go back to the store buy two, three, shoot even ten more. Because why not? The trick is to have one for every place you travel; one for your purse, one in your car, one in your bedroom, one in your bathroom vanity, one for your job,  one that can travel with you in your pockets if you like.  The reality is you hardly ever “lose” your chap-stick because you have five of them AND it’s like the reverse psychology prevents you from ever losing one.

**I have yet to lose one since I bought five more, but let me know how my theory stands up for y’all**

2. Less is more, is it really?

Okay, so in your closet yeah less is more. Actually alot of things in life are less is more. However with Chap-stick this is not the case. You can NEVER have too many chap-sticks especially if you found one  you love.  DON’T BUY ONE, BUY IN BULK.

3. Finding the one you LOVE.

So I have a few things I search for in a chap-stick kinda like my men. haha joking – or am I. Personally I love ones that are in super easy accessible tubes, make my lips feel super soft, even if it doesn’t moisturize well. And sometimes I like the cuteness of the tube, however, I usually want an ideal tube. Like ones that are small enough to fit in your pocket or wallet – easy, small tubes.

Although the “EOS” eggs are wonderful chap-sticks, they aren’t ideal. I can’t fit that egg in my pocket and once you’ve ran out of the the round part, do you know how hard it is to use the rest of the tube. *depressing*

And don’t get me started on all the chap-sticks that melt easily. But all in all, it is up to you to find just what one you love, and then how many extras you want to buy.

If you are looking for more of a scented brand or want a little flavor (for smooching 😉 I do like the “chapstick” brand – they have tons of flavors; cake batter, cherry, strawberry, classic, green tea, sugar cookie, and so on lol. Nivea and Blistex are really good for hydrating and moisturizing. Burt’s Beeswax is another good chapstick with flavor options.

4. My perfect match

Finally I reveal just which chap-stick I have five of. Yes – one in the car, one in my bedroom, one in my purse, one at work, and one in the bathroom. “Palmer’s Cocoa Butter Formula” It’s not a round tube, it more oval like. Its just what it says cocoa butter, like shea butter lotion on your lips. Heavenly.

I also use the classic, Carmex. I’m not always a huge fan of how greasy they make my lips feel, and the flavor isn’t too appealing to me but they make my lips super moisturized during the winter  months.

5. Seal the Deal

So let the task begin. Find your perfect match, the perfect chap-stick that will make you feel you, and give you the best moisturized lips out there. And WITHOUT, the hassle of losing your favorite chap-stick. Start at Walmart, your favorite grocery store or closest drug store. Go to the aisle with all the chap-sticks, yes there is an aisle, and looking at the ones by the check out will not have the whole selection. You kind of have to be invested and have the time to look because the amount of different chap-sticks there are can be overwhelming. If this is your thing, buy five different ones, test them out and see which one you like best. Or start with one of two and use the whole tubes before you decide or chose to try a different one. Personally I asked a couple of my closest friends which ones they use and which ones they love. I tested a few of theirs ad then tried a few of my own. It  is a trial and error test run but finding that perfect chap-stick will be well worth it.

The Chaos in my eyes

Hi everyone,

I started a new blog site. SO I will slowly be transferring over all my blog posts about my detox.

My blog is going to be everything and anything. I will be detailing my detox and how slowly and surely I hope to get rid of my migraines. And along the way I hope to find other things to blog about going on in my daily life.

Currently I will also blog about Religion, my journey through this Lent season, religious books I have read and loved- will do reviews and what I learned about myself through reading. Photography is also a small hobby of mine, I will share a few of my favorite photos taken here and there. I plan to do other reviews over other books, movies, wines, stores and outfits -just about anything I feel like expressing myself through writing. And lastly I will do other random posts about Valentine’s day, thoughts on conversations I’ve had and all the good stuff.


Thanks for coming along my journey in the Chaos.